I came for my woman, he came with a razor blade

I'm wearing a pair of older shoes today that are very durable, comfortable, and boot-like in construction. I've had them for 5 years now, and I've worn them across the world in the worst weather conditions and they've always held up fine. The reason I'm bringing this up is because recently I had a conversation with someone about an ex-girlfriend of mine. I told him I ran into her recently (she actually lived right around the corner from me for a little while), and she happened to be wearing an old shirt of mine that I thought I had lost. I really liked this shirt. I told her to give it back to me. I think it surprised her, but I was pretty adamant about it. Since she was close to my house, I got her another old t-shirt of mine, gave it to her, and made her change.

My friend asked me why I did that. He said don't you know that everytime she puts that shirt on she's going to think of you?

I hadn't thought of that, and after a while it sunk in that all these things really are artifacts. Whenever she put that shirt on (she swam in it, it was mostly for wearing at home or for running errands) she likely at least in passing thought of where it came from. This morning that happened to me. I don't wear these shoes all the time because they're kind of heavy, but they're perfect for winter. These shoes were probably one of the only good things that came out of that relationship. I started thinking about all the other things I have from previous relationships, and there are favorite boxers and t-shirts, books, a painting, and even a vase an ex threw for me.

There are definitely sad things associated with these things, but at the same time I realized that much of my history and how I defined myself was through these people, for better or worse. At first I thought that most of my artifacts were from ex-girlfriends, but I have artifacts from intense friendships as well. I carried a key chain that a friend of mine gave me 12 years ago that I carried daily until just recently, for example.

Even last names are artifacts. Someone I know divorce his wife two years ago, and his wife still carried his last name to his dismay. He said that he didn't think his wife deserved his last name, and he wanted it back. It's a funny thing. I never even really considered myself that sentimental, but I guess I am in my own way.